


Black and Pink

by theragingstorm



Category: Frozen (2013)
Genre: F/M, Nemeses AU, please don't ask me to continue this, superhero au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-10
Updated: 2015-02-10
Packaged: 2018-03-11 10:31:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,637
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3324266
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theragingstorm/pseuds/theragingstorm
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When the city of Arendelle's greatest superhero the Pink Punch, aka Anna, goes after the cat burglar Kristoff, she realizes that she may have bitten off a bit more than she can chew.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Black and Pink

**Author's Note:**

> This was inspired by the art of hmmmbrilee on Tumblr, who draws a thousand times better than I ever will.

On a normal Friday morning in the city of Arendelle, a young woman named Anna absently poured chocolate milk into their cereal as her sister Elsa turned on the morning news.

_"...and the police in the city of Arendelle are delighted by the rapid decrease in crime rate, brought on, they suspect, by the presence of a superheroine whom citizens have started to call the Pink Punch..."_

Anna gave a massive yawn and ran her fingers through the tangled mass of her bedhead. A grin slowly spread across her face as the news reporter continued talking about _her_ of all people.

Elsa was not quite so pleased.

"Don't these guys have anything else to report on? There are prepubescent girls all over the world being forced into marriages to men old enough to be their fathers, and all they can talk about is _you,_ " she grumbled. "And I don't like how everyone's attention is on you, either."

Elsa was not a very charitable person in the morning. Her sister had long ago gotten used to it.

"Don't be such a Debbie Downer, Elsa. I'm famous and loved for keeping the city safe from criminals. What could possibly be better?"

"Debbie Downer? Who even _says_ that anymore?"

Ignoring her pessimistic sister, Anna leaned forward and turned up the TV.

_"...however, a new cat burglar seems to be challenging the city's beloved superheroine. In the last week, seven consecutive buildings have been broken into and had valuable items successfully stolen, including the well-guarded penthouse of the Westergard family."_

Anna's mouth dropped open.

"Did Hans tell you about this?" Elsa breathed.

Anna shook her head.

_"Mr. Westergard, how did you and your brothers feel about this?"_

One of Hans' brothers -- the oldest, Alberto or Alfonso or something like that -- was on camera with all twelve of his brothers behind him. Most looked angry or sulky. Hans looked miserable.

"Well, John, we're all very upset about this. This appalling...person...not only took our late mother's jewelry and other antique heirlooms, but also took what was to be the engagement ring of my youngest brother."

"WHAT!?" both sisters screamed in unison.

_"That's very sad. I hope that the young lady understands."_

_"My brother hopes so too."_

_"Now, did any of you see the burglar for yourselves?"_

_"Albert did. Come here, Albert."_

Another one of the Westergard brothers came forward, looking deeply uncomfortable. The whole time he talked, he kept glancing at his forearm.

_"Yes, I saw him. I was getting up at around one in the morning to get a snack, and he was slipping out the window, but turned and looked at me. He was um, pretty tall, dressed all in black, had kinda blond hair sticking out under his ski cap. He smirked at me, then slipped out the window and just disappeared before I could do anything."_

_"So my brother was only a few feet from this criminal, but he still disappeared. It worries us all."_

_"Do you think that the Pink Punch will be able to apprehend him?"_

"Of course I can," Anna scoffed.

_"We certainly hope so."_

_"Thank you Alfons, and thank your brothers as well. Now for the weather, which will be mostly sunny for the next three days..."_

Elsa muted the TV, her eyes wide.

"Well, Anna..."

"Got another job to do, sis," Anna declared, stretching her arms over her head. "Could you call Rapunzel and tell her that we're going to have to postpone girls' night out?"

"Anna..."

"Oh yeah, and is my suit still in the wash after that run-in with the Stabbington Brothers?"

"Anna..."

"What?"

"This worries me."

She paused, and turned to her older sister. In public, Elsa's face was normally a calm mask, but now doubt and agitation seemed to pour out of her features.

"Doesn't this guy and his ability bother you?"

"He's a great criminal," Anna replied, dumping her cereal bowl in the sink. "They all tend to be. Besides, the brother who was talking seemed kinda wimpy to me; bet he just didn't want to point out that he wasn't fast enough to nab him."

"What if he's not as easy a catch as you think he is, though?"

Anna groaned.

"Well what do you think he is?" she asked sarcastically.

"I don't know," Elsa said, obviously frustrated. "And that's what worries me."

Anna walked back over to her sister and took her hand.

"Elsa, I know you worry about me a lot cause of what I do. But this is just a cat burglar. I've nabbed loads of those. And look at me; I'm no worse for wear. So, have faith in your awesome super-powered sister. I'll be cool."

Elsa smiled a little sadly.

"Well, that won't be easy. Since I'm the big sister it's my job to worry."

"Well, don't worry this time." Anna squeezed Elsa's hand. "Promise I'll be back by dawn this time."

"You'd better. I don't like when you're late. And Anna..."

"Yeah?"

"Just promise me you'll be careful."

 

_Promise me you'll be careful._

"I've _been_ careful," Anna muttered from her perch on top of a skyscraper. "But I've been out here since dinnertime, Elsa, and I've gotten nothing."

She'd searched practically the whole city by now. The sky-high homes of the rich folks, the poor shanties, the crumbling back alleys, the streets lined with expensive shops, the oft-graffitied subway stations. She'd come across snobby businesspeople, bored teenagers, naive heiresses, tired prostitutes, and frustrated homeless people -- all without being seen by any of them. (Even in her bright pink suit, Anna had learned to how to become one with her beloved city so no one noticed her. It may've been lonely and boring being invisible, but she knew that it made it easier to catch criminals.) But she still hadn't found that cat burglar.

Growling in frustration, Anna rocked back on her heels, glaring down at the sprawl of city lights below her. Who knew that this guy could be so hard to find? For once, one of these cat burglars was actually living up to the name.

Since she had nothing else to do, Anna kept staring down at the city, any person dressed in black immediately drawing her eye. A suited man. A woman in a cocktail dress. A Goth couple. A girl huddled in an alley. A figure scaling the side of a luxury hotel...wait a minute...

Anna leaped to her feet, gripping the top of the structure as she peered down. Super-sight wasn't one of her powers, but even from here she could tell that the figure was male, dressed in figure-hugging black clothing like a ninja, and had a satchel (probably for equipment or stolen goods) slung over his back.

Internally cheering, Anna leapt from the roof. She hit the pavement with enough force to crack it, but easily took off running from where she landed. She dashed through the streets of the city, nothing visible but a pink blur. When she reached the hotel, she looked up. The black figure was nothing more than a dot at the very top of the hotel, just at the penthouse level. It paused for about thirty seconds before slipping inside. Anna took a deep breath and sped into the hotel. She blazed through the silent lobby right up the stairs and up to the door of the penthouse, through which she could hear thumping, rustling, and the occasional muffled curse.

Slowly, she pulled a lock pick out of her belt and inserted it into the keyhole. After a few jerks of her wrist, the door glided open. Grinning in satisfaction, she unclipped her trusty handcuffs from her belt and strode inside.

The first thing Anna noticed inside the penthouse was the _opulence._ Glittering crystal chandeliers, a fur carpet at least an inch thick, mahogany-and white-leather furniture, abstract oil paintings, and a wardrobe with designer labels peeking between the doors. Anna didn't like to think that any place deserved to be robbed; but if there ever was, this was it.

The next thing she noticed was the cat burglar himself. He wasn't just _tall,_ he was at least six foot four and had a chest practically twice as wide as her shoulders. His huge hands and feet moved surprisingly deftly and silently, like he knew how to use them better than most people. A black mask was fitted around his large nose and focused brown eyes. Messy tufts of blond hair poked under his black ski cap. He currently was in the process of opening a jewelry chest and slipping diamond necklaces into his satchel, but even that small action caused his muscles to move smoothly under his outfit.

Anna suddenly had to remind herself that she was there to _arrest_ him.

With renewed authority, she marched up right behind him and barked,

"All right there, mister, put your hands up and turn around."

For a second, he froze.

"Are you a cop?" he rumbled, unmoving.

Damn it, even his _voice_ was sexy.

"No," she admitted. "But you're still screwed."

He slowly turned around, his hands raised to chest level. Feeling confident, she lifted the handcuffs up and began to extend them out to him...before their eyes met. His took a moment to look her over, before widening. Immediately, a smug smirk made its way across his face.

"Well, well, well, if it isn't Arendelle's famous crime fighter, the Pink Punch herself. And here I was scared that I'd be heading to jail tonight."

All her budding arousal vanished, to be replaced by pure annoyance. She should've known. Just because this guy happened to be hotter than most of the criminals she caught, why would he be any less disgustingly arrogant?

"Not scared, huh?" she replied. "And what makes you so fearless, oh great criminal? What makes you any luckier than any other villain that I've had locked away?"

He shrugged, almost modestly.

"Not much. Just more talented than most of the second-rate thieves you've dealt with before."

"Well, I won't deny that you are more talented than most of the second-rate thieves," Anna admitted. "But how about that serial killer and rapist, Claude Frollo? Or Bill Sykes the mob boss? Or, someone who doesn't have a name out of literature, the child kidnapper Myrna Gothel?"

"I don't care about people like that," he said dismissively. "I don't want to murder anyone, or deal drugs, or rape women, or steal babies. All I want is money. Don't you have anyone better to deal with?"

"Nope."

"Well, I'm touched."

"Awww, a kleptomaniac that has feelings. How cute."

"Sarcasm doesn't match your hairdo, sweetie."

"You're one to talk about hair. Do you _ever_ brush yours?"

"Okay, now you just sound like my mom."

"Speaking of your mom, what does she think about you choosing crime as a profession?"

"Oh, she loves it," he proclaimed with far too much earnestness. "When I was five, I told her, 'Mommy, I want to be a robber when I grow up!' And she said, 'Okay, sweetie, just always brush your teeth everyday and I won't mind whatever you are.' She doesn't _know._ "

Anna shook her head in mock disapproval.

"Aw. You're keeping secrets from your mommy? You're a such a bad boy for a hot guy."

Immediately, she wished that she could sew up her mouth.

His mouth dropped open and he gaped at her. When he recovered his voice, he said,

"Do you do this a lot? Compliment the people you're trying to apprehend?"

"Yes," she swiftly lied. "Helps them lower their guard. You know, being nice does pay off; you should try it sometime."

"In that case, your eyes are pretty and I like your freckles," he told her with astonishing sincerity.

Anna was so taken aback, all she could say was,

"Thank you...not even my boyfriend likes my freckles."

"Too bad for him. Oh, and by the way...?"

"Yeah?"

"You're right. Being nice to your enemies pays off."

Having slowly inched to the window while they'd been talking, he leaped out of it. Anna raced over to where he'd been, but he'd disappeared. All that was left of him was the remaining heat where his body had been. For a moment, all she could do was gape. In the entire year that she'd been fighting crime, she'd never come across an adversary who'd gotten the jump on her like that. Then she took a deep breath and screamed,

"FUCK YOU, YOU INCREDIBLY FULL OF YOURSELF, INCREDIBLY HOT, NO-GOOD _CRIMINAL!"_

There was no time to waste. He could be halfway across the city by now. Anna closed her eyes and listened. The sounds of the city rushed through her ears: cars, engines, people's voices...and the heartbeat and footfall of one man.

She leaped nearly a hundred stories down to the ground again, racing through the city even faster than normal, following the heartbeat. The lights of Arendelle became nothing but a blur around her as she doggedly ran after her personal nuisance (seemed like a good enough title for him).

Anna was beginning to get out of breath when she realized that his footsteps had finally paused. They seemed to pace back and forth a few times. And then they stopped.

_Ah,_ Anna thought to herself. _Now I've got you._

She slowed to a walk, and crept into the darkened alley where the footsteps had stopped. He was there, all right, bent over his satchel and sorting through his stolen goods. But there was going to be no bantering this time. As stealthily as was possible, she slipped up behind him.

"Maybe worth a few hundred dollars," he was muttering. "Cheap casing. Damn it, I thought this one would be the real moneymaker..."

Anna drew back her fist and sucker-punched him in the back.

Faster than he could react, the poor burglar went flying into a wall. He hit it with such force that several of the bricks broke off and fell on him. And Anna had been _restraining_ herself.

She casually strode up to him as he lay groaning under the broken bricks.

"Surprise, bitch. Now you know why they call me the Pink _Punch._ "

He pulled half a brick off his face and stared up at her. A rueful smile crossed his face.

"I gotta admit. That was pretty good."

"Thanks."

"Maybe we can agree that we're _both_ awesome."

"Sure. How awesome do you think you'll be in jail?"

Anna took out her handcuffs again, but this time hesitated. Something held her back, and it wasn't just his good looks. The truth was, she kind of liked him. He was smart, he was confident, he knew how to hold his own, and he could admit when she was better than him.

"What are you waiting for?" he asked.

Anna was snapped out of her thoughts.

"One chance, criminal. I'll give you one chance. After that, if I catch you again, you're going straight to the slammer."

He blinked a few times.

"Are you...letting me go?"

" _Yes,_ " she groaned. "Now you'd better go, before I change my mind."

A grin spread across his face. He shakily got to his feet, dusted himself off, and scooped up his satchel. He was turning to leave when Anna called after him,

"Hey, wait. How are we supposed to be nemeses if I don't even know your name?"

He turned back around. His grin became accompanied by a spark in his eyes.

"The name's Kristoff. See ya around."

And Kristoff ran off into the city again. Soon he disappeared into the city, but this time, she didn't chase after him. In fact, Anna turned the other way, back towards her own apartment. Her sister was waiting, and she could always arrest him the next time. If she was able to.

 

\--Fin--


End file.
